Wondering about wanting friends.

“We are hardwired to need people, and when we claim we don’t, something is amiss.” 

“you’ve convinced yourself you don’t really need friends because you are somehow an outlier to the human experience.” 

“Yes, [friendship] is necessary, said somewhere deep and true inside me.” 

“Make being a good friend a part of who you are, because a deep and true core that needs to belong lies within us all.” 

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I’ve said I don’t need friends. 

So, is something amiss? 

I’m starting to think yes… 

There are these whisperings, from the “deep and true” inside of me,  telling me that friendship is necessary, and might actually be good for me.

Not only for my health and happiness, but also because, with more social connections/interaction, I feel I could become more ME; a fuller, truer, version of myself. 

The thing is, I’m not in a position, as I currently stand, to just go out and make friends. 

The key to forming solid friendships is security; you need to feel safe around others; safe enough to be yourself. And that’s precisely my problem – I don’t. I’m damaged goods. 

“At our center, we are loving… It is only our tragedies that unplug us from this core. When we’re insecure, this core exists but is hidden… Finding security is finding our core… not about […] transforming, but […] excavating, finding out who we are underneath the graves we’ve dug and pieces of us we’ve buried for self-protection.” 

Quotes from Platonic: How Understanding Your Attachment Style Can Help You Make & Keep Friends by Marisa G. Franco